I forgot me. My identity as I woke up was not there. I was wondering who the fuck I was. I got a phone call around 10am with a “hey pretty boy.” I didn’t like sharing this part of me as it gets boring. It was extra bothersome this morning and frightening too. Oh well life is being scared shitless for some. I remember something and it was very interesting but I can’t say because I just forgot. I stand there frightened i lost my mind. I am standing there forgotten I hadn’t eaten and thirsty. But I start working hard and reading and learning about something interesting and hopefully real. I went to the same cafe again and she was there so it was all good. She was willing to help with the documentary thing. Its gonna be really short.
My brain is just not into sharing today as they say in AA meetings which I haven’t been to in more than 5 years. They are horrible and never work if you think maths-wise rather this perception-wise where the perceptron model of the neuron is used. Well 2 years of not wanting to drink and not drinking with a couple times really needing to drink. So my brain learned to deal with life by not buying alcohol and instead using more negative hiding from people and being mean. It’s how you deal with the situation that counts not having alcohol seems to count for something but only a stereotype if you like maths and not perceptions that you want. I know of white chicks who drink more than I could ever and have. I have pictures of them drinking but my brain said not to prejudge those pretty girls as you might fuck them and that’s what they are for. So I treat them nicely. Our brains have evolve to find good genes and such crap to exist for as long as possible for no reason. Just for the hell of it. No one matters.
Read time to remember the thing about maths and such things as vector bundles and instantons. It really works the twistor gives the homotopy spheres. I just can’t find a diffeomorphism. No gravity.
Filed under: Memory loss 
